London digested all those sounds, but he didn't know how he wanted to rhyme, either. Still, he and Majestic got more serious about their hobby, eventually finishing Fish Fillet and Pancakes , an album they opted not to release.
They kept recording. In early , while at a Kooley High and King Mez concert, they learned that making music in a makeshift apartment studio wasn't enough. They were actually out here performing, and the only thing that Majestic and I were doing was just sitting back and making music, sitting at home complaining. It was an awkward awakening. London felt like an underachieving, fringe member of the hip-hop community, maybe even a poseur.
He wanted to be accepted, so he got to work. When he and Majestic were just having fun, London had prided himself on insightful lyrics. But in his rush to finish The Manual and join the scene, he lost that focus, resulting in the ramshackle lines of songs like "Nike Shoe Box" or "Red Chucks. London didn't know what kind of rapper he wanted to be. I told him that he needed to get deeper. He wanted to, but all he did was internalize everything. London had willed himself into the ranks.
That he released the album at all was no small miracle: For years, his mother had struggled with health problems. On the day she planned to register London for his junior year at Knightdale High after he relocated to the Raleigh suburb, worsening congestive heart failure kept her in bed.
The next morning, I made up my mind that I was never going back. I was going to focus on rap. Two years later, just as he was trying to finish The Manual , London's mother suffered a stroke in her sleep and passed away, leaving behind a book in which she had kept her wishes for her children: "Take care of your brothers and sisters, always chase your dreams, and finish school," she wrote to London. But he never finished. He kept working on The Manual. If his raps sounded troubled, he was.
I gained a lot of weight. I didn't care how my clothes or hair looked. It really affected my music because I was writing as a distraction. All I really cared about was making it and making it out.
But music didn't help him make it out. In fact, The Manual seemed to miss its audience almost entirely. If London had copped the style of the popular kids, that crowd didn't notice. I was spending all this time and money to put a video out, just for it to only get views. I didn't see the big picture.
His friends, Majestic included, talked him out of quitting. He released a couple of mixtapes as practice. We include a link to your profile in band openings, to build trust with musicians and help them decide if they will be a good fit.
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